To cats, we are terrorists

I have cats. Two of them. I have no idea how this happened. I've never had cats before in my life. Just about everyone in my immediate family loathes cats.

Kittens, they are. About six months old. Brothers. An orange tabby, a big doofus, names Samson. And a sleek, soft, soulful black one named Cash. For the original Man in Black, Johnny Cash.

My family always had dogs. There are so many differences. But these two cats kind of act more like dogs than any other cats I've met. Maybe it's that they know I have certain expectations of them. So far the biggest "cat" tenet I have not been able to accept and they have not been able to overcome is the fearfulness. If you bring a new item into a home with a dog, their thought pattern seems to be, "Oh, that's new." Sniff. "Huh. Well, it's not in my way, not blocking the food bowl, and not blocking the exit, so, okay, whatever."

Bring a new item into a house with a cat, and they seem to be screaming at the top of their lungs to each other or anyone who might understand, "OH MY GOD, WHAT IS THAT? OH MY GOD, IT MUST BE A BOMB. OH MY GOD THE TERRORISTS BROUGHT A BOMB AND LEFT IT HERE." Then, they look at you and an affect of horrific understanding comes over their faces, "OH MY GOD, YOU BROUGHT IT. YOU ARE A TERRORIST."

I just wish they could calm down and be more accepting and trustful.

I've neglected this train...

Posting here seems so laborious, what now with Facebook... I should really work to put on my writing cap more often. That was the whole point of starting this thing... get me in the habit of writing.

and, it continues

My membership as an honorary Jew, that is. It's a years-long saga. Most recent entry:

In yesterday's mail came an invitation from a local synagogue to attend High Holiday services for free. No obligation to become a member, but if I haven't found a synagogue in the area, they can't wait for me to meet their "warm, friendly members and engaging Rabbi on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur". It's a "traditional conservative" synagogue. Sadly, I don't think I'd fit in.

prepare-ahead meat brings peace of mind

I'm in search of a recipe for cookies that I can take to a far-away picnic (i.e. can be prepared a couple of days ahead of time, will travel well, and non-melty). Perusing my cookbooks, (in the wrong chapter) I came across this photo in the Farm Journal's Country Cookbook, copyright 1959.


In case you can't read the caption, it says:
Molded Beef Ring Meat set in gelatin and waiting in the refrigerator brings peace of mind when company's coming.

Yes, those are pimento olives and ketchup trails for decorative topping.

unforseen benefits

The more hours you sleep, the less time there is for consuming calories. ;)

best / worst idea ever

Thinspiration. Take a picture of yourself in spandex pants and a sports bra. Front, back, profile.

Oh, the horror. That chocolate bar looks a little different, on.

50 lbs. Already lost 3. Start date was June 1, 2009. No deadline set. But every day I'm making choices.

Check back for updates. And yes, the before and after photos.

words

When you were a kid did you ever say something intended to hurt someone else's feelings, and instead you ended up crying?

I made this!

The teal/brown bolster pillow. See I have this table runner on my dining room table:

That's just the corner, so you can see the colors. My living room has always been red and brown, and I added golden yellow pillows. When I bought this table runner I wanted to get the teal color into my living room (my living room and dining room have been VERY close together in my last two houses) but I couldn't find that color toss pillow anywhere. So I bought the bolster and fabric and ribbon and made it myself! The lighting is different in the two pics, but they match perfectly.

It's very rewarding! I mean, I didn't miss my calling, that's for sure. No future Project Runway contestant here.

how much punishment do you deserve?

I met someone today who keeps kosher.... and is a vegetarian. Exactly how much guilt is she carrying around?

Tanning bed bursts into flames; man escapes OR closeted gay nearly outed by tanning bed tragedy

By Shawn Cetrone - The (Rock Hill) Herald

Published: Tue, Mar. 10, 2009 08:32AM Modified Tue, Mar. 10, 2009 08:35AM

LAKE WYLIE, S.C. -- A man escaped from a tanning bed as it burst into flames, sparking a fire that evacuated a Lake Wylie shopping center and damaged several stores Monday, authorities said.

No one, including the man in the bed, was hurt. But several stores in the Bethel Commons strip mall off S.C. 274 and S.C. 49 suffered smoke damage that will likely keep them closed most of the week, said Bethel Fire Chief Don Love.

Authorities are investigating what ignited the bed at Ultratan.

The man who escaped declined to give his name but said he was working on his tan when he heard a popping noise, then saw a flame at the corner of the tanning bed near his foot. He threw open the lid and jumped out, he said.

When firefighters arrived around 4:15 p.m. "smoke was pouring out of all sides of the building," said Bethel Assistant Fire Chief David Long. By 5:30 p.m. the fire was out and smoke cleared.

DOOMED!

My dad told me my new haircut makes me look like a young Liza Minelli.



I'm fated forever to only love and be loved by gay men.

duped by my own expectations

One of my favorite things to do one weekend afternoon on occasion is head to the Eastern Market. For those of who who don't know it's a DC landmark offering vendors of all kinds - artists, a farmers' market, flea market, etc. Inside they also have a deli, butcher, pastry & cheese shop, etc.

I needed a soap dish for next to my kitchen sink. Not for soap, but for my scrub sponge. (You know, the one you use to scrub the counters. Because the dish sponge has to be a different one altogether. You know, right? Thank you, my OCD Anonymous supporters.)

I found a vendor with all kinds of colorful glass work - serving dishes, salsa dippers, probably some ash trays, and aha! soapdishes. I chose the chili peppers.

Cute, right? As I was paying her and she was wrapping my purchase I pictured this woman arriving early every weekend morning to set up her stand, her husband staying home and working sun up to sun down on his glass wares in their garage converted into his workshop.

Then I got home, satisfied post-purchase, and unwrapped my wares. I proceeded to the kitchen to wash my new glass sponge-holder (of course I was going to wash it before putting my sponge to rest on it!) It was sitting out all day - who knew for how many days!

Here's what I found on the back:

It's probably so loaded with lead I'll be dead in a year.

yuck

I am recovering from a wicked 24-hour stomach bug that hit Sunday in the middle of the night. Since Monday evening I've been surviving on dry Cheerios and crackers. Tonight on the way home from work I decided I was starving and feeling well enough that I could venture to some plain rice (woohoo!)

On a supermarket sweep a few weeks ago (I think I spent over $300 restocking my house for the first time since Christmas) I bought these things called Ready Rice from Uncle Ben's. I didn't realize what they were when I picked them up. It's a packet of rice that ready in 90 seconds by adding two tablespoons of water and heating. Nobody needs to make dinner that quickly.


I had a packet of plain brown rice on hand, but felt my body was craving some vegetables after my 24-hour cleanse followed by two days of fasting (Not that what's in here could possibly count even as half a serving of veggies for a child, even.) so I ventured for the Garden Vegetable variety.

I've never owned a cat but the sensation that struck me as I tore open the pouch and squeezed the slightly moist, clumpy contents into the skillet was that of feeding a pet feline.

I think I'll donate the other two pouches in my pantry. And take the 10 minutes to cook the boil-in-bag brown rice from now on.

the best dog in the world

Thes 08.18.92 - 01.30.09


Spent a lot of time at the vet's today, talking to the Dr. The outlook was grim no matter what. I knew that. I mean, even if the tumor in her abdomen is removable, the rest of her body is still 100 years old. And she had so many other things going on.

I didn't get to do what I wanted -- which was spend hours laying with her telling her how much she was loved and then cook and feed her a NY strip steak. But I thought even one more night would be cruel to her.

I'm going to spread her ashes in the woods behind my parents' house, where I used to sneak off to as a teenager with her (then a puppy), and where my dad took her for long walks when they kept her when I went to Australia. Great memories, a wonderful dog. She'll be coming back as a queen of a very rich nation.

I'm wearing one of my Mom's favorite shirts for comfort -- one she wore all the time the year before she died. It's a horrible cotton/poly blend from KMart, but somehow it feels like cashmere.

best seat in the house

My view of the inauguration:


Okay, okay, I know, it's lame. I'm an easy metro ride into the city, and I'm living back here for the first time in years, and I didn't go. It was 30 degrees and I wanted to actually see the inauguration. I was in the city every other day or night that week. I got the buzz. And very much enjoyed it from my couch.